Faith

Okay, well I am going to talk about something I really don't talk about much, but since I did something on Sunday that I have not done since grade school, I thought why not, it got me to think. I went to church with my neighbor, she had been taking my youngest son with her for a few months now because her son and my son mine are best friends. So she talked me into going and taking all my kids with her. I was a little uncomfortable at first because I don't really believe in a one religion being right or wrong...they all in my opinion have there good and bad points. I was raised as a baptist, but when I was in sixth grade I was saved and was going to be baptized, but my cousin that was the preacher..killed himself a week before I was supposed to be baptized....So I and my family quit going to church...I never really stop believing but for years and years I really did not know what to believe...and really still don't.

I have been to many many churches of different religions, hoping to find my place...but it has never really happened for me. I somehow feel like all of the religion belittle women...and always place man above women...I have a problem with that...and I guess I always will. I know that there is a higher power but that is all I believe, I try to live by the saying to unto to others and you wish done unto you....and I just keep it that way. As for the church we went to...it was a baptist church....but my kids love it and want to go back...all of them even my teenager....that was a shocker for me....As for me I will go because they want to go. But as soon as I find out that they are teaching my kids to fear GOD or the higher power they will not go back...I don't feel that he/she should be feared....why fear someone that is supposed to love us????

I was very disappointed in all churches when me and my now husband was looking for someone to marry us....we searched for several months to find someone...we wanted a church wedding..and we were told no, so many times. They said that since we were both divorced and that I had kids they would not marry us and we were sinners.....I really lost faith then and so did he....that is and was crazy.....his wife cheated on him and mine tried to kill me several times..but the preachers said that they did not care why were divorced..it was a sin to remarry....just imagine how that would make you feel. We finally found a church that would marry us, was a "United church of Christ"....I found them by the commercial they had shown on TV. It was them taking anyone into the church, not turning people away just because of sexual orientation or race...etc....It was a touching commercial. We meet with the preacher and he welcomed us with open arms into the church and gave a us the perfect wedding that we wanted...so I retained some faith at that point....So I guess what I am blogging about is that I believe, but haven't found my place to fit in yet. If that makes sense....Sorry to ramble but this is something that I needed to talk about....Still looking for my faith.

PEACE, LOVE AND MANY BLESSINGS TO EVERYONE!!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!